How To Give An Amazing Blow Job

i do not lick pussy. Trimmed, shaved, bushy, juicy, and slippery or downright squirting in my face—I just don’t do it. Now, breasts are another story. I’m the type of woman who openly admires a fine rack from across the room. I like breasts that are perky—but not too perky to the point of being fake—and voluptuous. Mmmmm. I can bury my face in breasts for hours. Just don’t ask me to go down on you.

On the bisexual spectrum this makes me bi-selfish. Hot bitches can suck away on me all day if they wish, but I’m not interested in returning the favor. However, you stick a cock in my face? Twenty minutes later you need to pry the damn thing out of my Pitbull jaws. I clamp on and go.

I’ve had women ask me over the years what they can do to give good head. My response is always the same: You gotta love it. My pussy licking skills are negligent at best because I go down on women as if I’m sipping tea with my pinky finger waving in the air. I suck at sucking pussy because I’m not into it.

Here are some tips if you got to fake it ‘til you make it or you already like sucking cock, but you figure you might pick up some pointers from a cock-sucking connoisseur:

1. Probably the most important factor in giving good head is you need to be into the guy attached to the penis. Going down on somebody who doesn’t turn you on, or hasn’t bothered to turn you on yet, is a recipe for limp dick disaster. It’s okay to make him wait a while and have him get you going before you unzip his fly.

2. PDA (entirely too much PDA) gets me really turned on. One thing I like to do is whisper, “I can’t wait to suck your cock,” while waiting in line at the movies or while sipping a glass of wine. I may also lightly brush my fingers over his crotch (I keep it classy by keeping it our secret) and smile ever so slightly. The brain is the biggest sexual organ, so building anticipation is huge.

3. One of my favorite positions is to be on my knees with my head between his legs while he’s sitting upright on the bed. Fully clothed, I like to nuzzle through his jeans and rub his legs before pulling out that erect shaft of goodness.

4. “You first” can be a lot of fun for me and my guy. I like to keep my dress, heels, and panties on while I slowly get him naked. I make sure I lightly caress his thighs, chest, and arms as I barely brush my nose and lips over his throbbing cock. It’s a good kind of teasing.

5. I love being naked. I’m a bigger girl, and I find that men really like me naked too. In other words, if you’re going to take your penis slurping up a notch, you have got to be confident in your own skin. Get naked and be happy about it.

6. If you find yourself wanting a second round after he comes, and he’s currently limp, ask if he’s ready to give it another go. If he says yes, take that spent shaft in your mouth and suck on it like a pacifier. These short, quick bursts of sucking should get him ready in no time.

7. Do not be afraid to discuss Viagra and/or Cialis with a lover. If you do it out of love and horniness—I just want to be able to fuck you more, baby—he will thank you for it.

8. Pay attention to what he’s doing to you and see if he likes the same sorts of things. Salt-N-Pepper likes to bite. I’m a bruised mess—but it’s his thing, and I think it is sexy having him want to devour me, so I like it. When I have him in my mouth, I will take a break from his shaft and lightly bite his inner thigh. His groaning tells me that I’m making the right decision.

9. Learn how to open up your throat. If you have not seen Deepthroat, Linda Lovelace’s cock sucking is worth a quick trip to the adult book store. I cannot keep nine inches in my mouth like she can, but I do like to feel the tip of his cock hitting the back of my throat. It makes me feel like a porn star. Sure, my eyes water and I gag a little, but it’s a fun party trick I’m happy to indulge in from time to time.

10. Every man is different. Some like a little teeth hitting their cock, and others like less pressure. The best way to give the best head is to communicate with the guy connected to the penis. Pay attention to his writhing and his moaning. He will let you know when you’re doing it right.

Many novices pretty much stop their mouths, hands, and lips at about three inches down the shaft of the cock. They forget about the balls, perineum, ass, and thighs. They swallow their spit instead of using it as lube. They don’t mix up their speed or make eye contact. They don’t go for it. Similar to my oh-this-isn’t-a-tea-party pussy licking style, they pretty much suck.

Don’t be that girl.

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